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Mar. 10th, 2006 12:25 am![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
walbournThis week has been a mix of high-stress, complex days at work and quiet, isolated nights at home. I've been finally catching up on months of recorded sci-fi shows, specifically Battlestar Galactica which I had TEN episodes cued up. The show is awesome, but so damn dark and emotionally draining to watch that I watch about 3 in a row, then don't look at it for months.
Decided to watch a DVD instead tonight, and choose one of my recent birthday gifts: The Incredibly True Adventure of Two Girls In Love. It's your classic lesbian coming-of-age story. I'd be lying to say I don't like the scenes of two hot young girls making out, but for the most part I'm a sucker for a potentially tragic love story. This one wasn't terribly tragic or dark, but a humorous little independent film. It really reminded me of what life was like back in high school: the awkward searching for one's identity, the cruel pressures to conform with societal standards, and the desire to find and experience the thrill of love.
I'm now twice as old as I was when I was an eighteen year old in my senior year of high school. The years between have been full of experiences both blissful and heart-rending, and I often wonder if I'm the worse for wear. I've let my sadness get the better of me for too many years, but I'm not sure where to go from here. I guess I'm just tired of coming home to an empty house.
I'm grateful my life is not as lonely as it was once. The last few years in Austin were a morass of depression that I'm glad I was able to finally escape--even if it was chasing the illusion of a possible life with Andrea that brought me out here. I guess as![[livejournal.com profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/external/lj-userinfo.gif)
loree says, I need to get out of the cultural wasteland that is the Eastside, get a house somewhere closer to friends, and get on with my life.
For now I should just get my ass to bed and try to get to sleep without dwelling on past choices, lost loves, or the little fears everyone feels in the quiet hours of the night.
Decided to watch a DVD instead tonight, and choose one of my recent birthday gifts: The Incredibly True Adventure of Two Girls In Love. It's your classic lesbian coming-of-age story. I'd be lying to say I don't like the scenes of two hot young girls making out, but for the most part I'm a sucker for a potentially tragic love story. This one wasn't terribly tragic or dark, but a humorous little independent film. It really reminded me of what life was like back in high school: the awkward searching for one's identity, the cruel pressures to conform with societal standards, and the desire to find and experience the thrill of love.
I'm now twice as old as I was when I was an eighteen year old in my senior year of high school. The years between have been full of experiences both blissful and heart-rending, and I often wonder if I'm the worse for wear. I've let my sadness get the better of me for too many years, but I'm not sure where to go from here. I guess I'm just tired of coming home to an empty house.
I'm grateful my life is not as lonely as it was once. The last few years in Austin were a morass of depression that I'm glad I was able to finally escape--even if it was chasing the illusion of a possible life with Andrea that brought me out here. I guess as
loree says, I need to get out of the cultural wasteland that is the Eastside, get a house somewhere closer to friends, and get on with my life.For now I should just get my ass to bed and try to get to sleep without dwelling on past choices, lost loves, or the little fears everyone feels in the quiet hours of the night.
